The Love of Christ in a Pink Crayon

Let me start off by saying that being Caroline’s mom has totally revolutionized the way I am able to understand God’s love for me.  I think any parent would agree, you don’t know love to its fullest expression until you love your own child.  In my life B.C. (before Caroline, that is), I often didn’t understand the elaborate one year old birthday parties parents threw for their children.  I sort of judged it as a good excuse for parents to throw a party for themselves.  Pretty sure I even said out loud something to the effect of “when my first kid turns one, I’m just going to have some family over and eat pizza since the little one won’t know what’s going on.” 

And then everything changed when I looked into Caroline’s little smushed face on June 27^th, 2012.  That day was a bitter-sweet experience for our family.  Caroline was born full term at a hefty 8 lbs. 3 oz. but during labor contracted what they diagnosed as Group B Strep Pneomonia and wasn’t able to breathe on her own.  We were told that she would be under treatment in the NICU for at least 14 days.  By God’s divine intervention, Caroline was released on Independence Day Eve just 6 days later, completely healed.  That experience taught me many things about God’s character and I got to witness right from the start that my daughter’s health is completely in His hands.  This experience of the One True God healing Caroline gave me the confidence to follow Him leading us to live in the unfamiliar land of Mongolia.

One of the first hard thoughts I had when thinking about our time in Ulan Bator, was that Caroline’s first birthday would be a four day journey away from our family and close friends.  In processing my disappointment with the Lord, I began to realize that those elaborate one year old birthday parties are in fact for the child and not the parents.  Scriptures about God preparing a table for us and celebrating our salvation in Heaven all started to make sense.  He delights in His children, even though they are completely unaware.  He takes great joy in celebrating us, cheering for us, and loving us even if we never fully understand.  He simply loves giving good gifts to his children.   

And so my quest to make a great one year old birthday party in a second-world country began.  On a missionary’s salary, I was required to “DIY” everything (except the cake because we don’t have a working oven).  I used those creative brain cells that had to be kick-started with a steel-toe boot.  And then, I did what I had always previously thought of as a huge waste of time: I got on Pintrist.  With some scrap book paper and a loaned glue gun that I packed in my suitcase (thanks, Tania!), I set out to make our communist Russian era apartment look like a place to party.   

I prayed that God would give me wisdom, creativity, and enjoyment in the work.  I asked that He would redeem the painful memories of June 27^th just one year ago and give us His omnipresent love to make up for the fact that our loved ones are so far away.  God graciously and abundantly granted all of my requests!  He was in every little victory throughout the day.  I felt his Presence and heard his Voice, guiding me in every little decision and thought.  He helped me be grateful in each moment rather than thinking about who and what wasn’t there.  

Among the many miracles that happened that day, one of them stood out to me as a testimony of God’s love for me.  The story of Caroline’s birthday goes like this: 

In true Mongolian fashion, the power and water unexpectedly got shut off the morning of her party.  Since I couldn’t use the glue gun to finish up the decorations, I felt like God told me to go out and get the last minute items and pick up the cake.  I stumbled upon enough disposable pink cups, forks, and napkins for our ever-growing invite list that consisted of friends from church and our Mongolian acquaintances we were reaching out to.  After walking all over town to find balloons and paper plates, I finally found some plain white plates that were within our party budget.  I was told in very broken English that the city supplier of helium was completely out, so I wouldn’t be able to buy inflated balloons at all that day.  I chose not to believe them because I knew how much Caroline loved a balloon she received a couple weeks ago, so I walked to two other stores and sure enough, no helium balloons to be found.  

A little disappointed about the balloon but sincerely grateful for what I did find, I went home to set everything up and check on the power and water situation.  I arrived home about two hours before the party started and found the electricity and water still shut off, but it actually didn’t bother me at all.  I set out the cups, napkins, and cutlery on the table and that’s when this tiny miracle happened.  

I heard Jesus’ still, small voice that told me to go look in the storage closet by the kitchen and there I would find a cup on the back shelf.  Without hesitation I went there and inside the cup, in the back of this random closet I rarely open, was 1 pink crayon.  I remembered from my Pinterest-ing the night before that I could “customize” my blank white plates to match the party.  With a weird excitement I went to work on the plates, relishing in the matchy-matchyness of it all.

Thirty minutes before the party, I prayed over the phone with one of my teammates for the power to turn on so I could make the microwave popcorn.  Not but ten minutes later, we were back in business with full power and water!  Also the Franzen family that lives on the other side of town found not one, but TWO balloons for Caroline to enjoy.  Finding this pink crayon was actually the smallest miracle of the day, but to me the most significant.  God showed me that he cares about the little things.  He wanted Caroline’s party to be special even more than I did.  He loves throwing a great party.

My true motive behind throwing Caroline her birthday party is that I want her to look back at pictures and know that she is cherished and celebrated.  Even though her birthday party may not be as elaborate as her friends back in America, it was put together with all the love, affection, and creativity I have in my being because I long for her to know that she is loved by me.  When I think about how I feel about Caroline in all of this, I cannot fathom how much God longs for us to know about His love for us!  Sharing the Love of Jesus for his people is precisely why God led us here and why I am now loving every minute of it!  

“Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God… God showed how much he loves us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him.” 1 John 4:7 & 9  

My pink crayon

   Little Buttercup with her birthday balloon

Happy Birthday, Caroline! 

You are loved.